Past failures lead to more randomness

I have attempted to blog in the past.

Two separate blogs. One about my ridiculous life at that time, and one about a bucket list that I kind of have.

Some days I am convinced that I have a undiagnosed case of ADD. I start things (blogs, workout routines, hobbies, etc.) and then abruptly stop them because, well, I honestly just get bored. I just.. can't.. concentrate. If I see something shiny, I'm done for. If someone talks to me, I've abandoned ship and I'm into la-la-land talking about golf, llamas, and random people in my department who like to flaunt their boobs. I'm sure all of my coworkers hate love me for it.

So here I sit, creating yet another blog. Third time's the charm? It's go time.

This is my weekend off of work. I had huge grandiose plans that I would have bff time, followed by whatever time, and then ending with a great party for my niece.
Yep, all those plans went down the shitter, and here I sit. My bff bailed on me (for which I do not blame her- she should spend time with her dadski/broski. In reality, I envy her, but that's for another time...) Some friends I would like to see have to work, boo, and others, well, they are married or have a bf/gf, you know how it goes. So now I have no plans. And I don't know what to do with myself.

I normally have something to do all the time. I mean really, ALL the time. Weekdays are ridiculous, weekends that I work are ridiculous, and that's how it goes. So when I have nothing planned to do, I begin to go stir crazy before the day even begins.

What is wrong with me??

So as I sit here, doing some hardcore pouting and cursing at the universe, I attempt to make plans. Plans that I doubt I will even be able to follow through with. My Saturday should contain cleaning, cleaning, and money budgeting. What I want it to contain is golfing range, scrapbooking, and watching girlie movies. What is will more than likely contain is sleeping in super late, staying in my pajamas until 4ish, showering, eating food, and then bumming around on the puter until bedtime at 8ish.
Yes, reality sounds wonderful, but I never wanted to be that person. I blame my job for making me into that person. Working every other weekend really screws with your body. You have no idea what day is what. It sucks monkey balls. So at times like these, I wish I already had that second job that I applied for. Then I never have to worry about finding a way to fill free time, because I just won't have any.
Like I said, I am used to having something to do ALL the time.
I'm crazy, I know.

Right now I just want to cry my eyes out because I watched Nicholas Sparks' book/movie "The Last Song". Holy shizz, I bawled throughout the last half of the movie. It was horrible, and was hitting way too close to home. I couldn't hardly stand to watch the rest of it, but I prevailed and made it through it. Nicholas Sparks is an evil genius that wants to play with all of our emotions and make us feel horribly about ourselves because we cry through every movie of his. Makes me feel like a major softie, a drama queen, or an incredibly messed up individual. I could honestly go any of those ways.

On that note, I think it's bedtime.

I wonder if I will be in a positive mood tomorrow.

Ha, who am I kidding. I will be a bitter old lady who is mad at the world. I'm calling it right now.

And when I am correct, you can send me all of the seasons of the sitcome 7th Heaven. I WANT IT SO BAD. So freakin bad. So, make it happen.

Catch ya on the flip side.
BAMF