Anxiety

Lately I have had the worst anxiety.
My mind races, I get nervous, and feel sick.
Work is just becoming too much.
There are so many things that I have had to do and worry about in the past 3 weeks, and it is all coming to a breaking point.
My boss is supposed to finally be back on Wednesday, so I hope that the rumors are true.
If she is, that will cut my anxiety levels in half.
Fo realz.
Damn jobs, causing nothing but problems.
On the plus side, my paycheck is pretty nice thanks to that OT I got the week before Christmas.
Hot damn, I could get use to that.

So, my coworker gets married tomorrow.
Thank god I get to go with a bunch of coworkers- going to weddings single is really starting to get to me.
I would almost not go.
Almost.
I have to work early, then rush to the city to get to the ceremony.
All because they wouldn't get us support help for a day.
For one, fucking day.
Bastards.

Ok, so I promised you fine folks that I would have some thoughts for you.
Yes, the above word vomit aren't even what I intended to tell you all.
Have I bored you to death yet?
Do you still care to hear?
Yes? OK.
Between now and October I want to participate in a 5k.
Back in 2010 I completed ten 5ks.
It was great, and I miss it.
Right now a few things are hindering my start to training, and they are as follow:
- Winter in MN = icy roads, freezing temps, and little daylight.
- I just cancelled my gym membership because I can't afford it

Yes, those aren't huge reasons holding me back, but they are reasons none the less.
I've determined one thing about myself in my life, and that is that if I don't have my mind determined to do something, I won't do it.
I can't have any excuses, and I have to do it on my own terms.
Right now, winter is holding me back.
The lack of daylight is a killer, especially since I leave for work in the dark, and it's dark soon after I get home.
Eventually things will be in my favor, and then I will go from there.
Otherwise, I figure I have 9 months to accomplish this mini goal.
Totally possible.
Old man winter just needs to leave.

Well, that is all that I got for you today.
Tune in next time, Sunday, for the new update of my overly dramatic life.

Anxiously yours,
Bamf